It's a long road, but I'm taking it one step at a time...

My Mini-Goal

8/08/10 to 8/31/10-to lose 6 lbs this month

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

(tap tap --squeaaaaaaak--) Ahem... is this thing on?

I'm just wondering if anyone is out there because I could really use the company.

I am not a professional blogger and I'm not that computer savvy. I looked up "blogging" and I have gotten a bunch of different sites telling me about monotizing and HTML coding... I don't do Facebook or Twitter or Digging or pinging any of that jazz myself. I'm not much of a social networker. I can surf the web, read websites, occasionally jump in on discussion boards and I like to express my feelings in writing.
I'm pretty new to the blogging world in general. I have been reading some other blogs I have stumbled upon that I like and I am seeing comments... and I must admit I am a bit jealous. It's making me feel lonely.

I want people to talk to. I want to hear from people who have taken this journey, or who are taking it, or who are on it, or just who have some kind of thoughts about it even though they will never need to lose weight. I want to hear from fellow Witches and fellow fatties alike (pardon me if the phrase offends you; I use it in the most affectionate way).

I have no way of knowing (at least, if there is a way, I am clueless) if anyone has been reading anything I have written, but if you have I would really appreciate a shout-out with a comment.

I guess I should do a little advertising too, which I will begin, even though I feel a little uncomfortable just hopping around going, "hey, read my blog!" I don't know why... it feels a little like inviting people to read my diary. It's a little scary here, inviting people in to my secret life and all my issues and problems put up front on display, but at the same time, I need someone to hear me.

I do talk to my husband, and of course my family and friends know I am trying to lose weight, but there are so many personal issues that are hard for me to talk about. I've never been very good at deep conversations about myself. Sure I can be a good friend and listen to or advise others but it has always been hard for me to talk about me.

Now writing about me, that somehow is different. It’s like whatever blockage that prevents the words from escaping my throat reroutes them to my fingertips, from which they flow much more effortlessly.

Even when I was younger, I had pen pals that I revealed more of myself to than some of my closest friends, and I used to write letters and cards to people whenever I really needed to tell them something about myself.

Also, there are certain issues that I don’t like to talk about to people when it might get back to my mother or family. Certain abuses and such that took place... I’m always afraid they are going to get back to the family. I don’t want everyone to know. I guess I have not had good experiences with my family keeping secrets, lol.

So I come here, and I write... and I guess I get a little long and drawn out. But I hope, at least sometimes, someone is out there hearing me. Or will be.

So I’m going to try throwing my blog link out there a bit... and I hope, if you are out there, I will hear from you soon. Maybe it won’t feel so lonely then.

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I would enjoy hearing your encouragement, reasonable criticism, questions, insights, advice and experiences. Comments will be moderated, however. I realize there may be people out there who only want to insult me for my weight or attack my beliefs in Witchcraft. There are plenty of forums for doing that. This is not one of them.

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